Low life

rwanda

The lessons I learned cycling across Rwanda

November 21, 2019 2:05 pm

‘There is no ethnicity here now’, said my escort Eric, moments before I shot headfirst over the handlebars

maid gong yoga

What did the maid make of my penis vacuum pump?

November 19, 2019 1:13 pm

While I was out, she had polished it and positioned it on a glass shelf lit by four spotlights

wansdyke

My journey to the heart of prehistoric England

October 31, 2019 10:35 am

I would be staying in this cottage in the shadow of Wansdyke to see if I wanted to rent it

french

The mysterious ways of the French

September 5, 2019 10:50 am

Everything in this country is as strange to me today as it was five years ago

A trip to Dartmoor Prison with my grandson and his cousin

August 1, 2019 2:59 pm

Nine-year-old Oscar is a mentor to eight-year-old Lucas

italy

Italy, in seven hours and five trains

July 18, 2019 12:14 pm

People laughed when I told them my plan but nothing beats the window seat of a stopping train hugging the Ligurian coast

climate

Tuscany’s killer climate

July 11, 2019 4:13 pm

As my engine died, a thunderclap exploded overhead and I noticed that I was freezing cold and soaked to the skin

mistral

Will the Mistral drive me to murder?

May 9, 2019 2:19 pm

I was the first Leaver my neighbors had met and I was treated like a former Kray or a Moonie

tour guide

Meet Santino: the world’s worst tour guide

May 2, 2019 11:37 am

The sculptured eroticism of Henry II’s mistress’s bedroom brought to mind an orgy at its peak – not that he noticed

freebie vacation

A moral dilemma on my freebie vacation

April 18, 2019 9:55 am

What should I tell people when they ask me my ‘profession’?

gardener

Am I about to be usurped by Philippe, our handsome French gardener?

April 4, 2019 1:01 pm

All the women – Catriona included – seem to have fallen under his spell

Up close with the Rolling Stones

July 6, 2018 3:37 pm

Ronnie Wood’s girlfriend was there – and Mick’s oldest Dartford school friend.

I like Donald Trump — but don’t tell anyone

September 2, 2017 9:00 am

I arrived for lunch a bit late and was led to the dining table. Our hostess disappeared back into the…