Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez held a town hall congress meeting on Thursday in Corona, New York, at the Queens Public Library, during which an alleged constituent stood up and began by expressing her dismay at the current climate crisis, which ended in her shouting, ‘We have to start eating the babies!’
At first many of us identified with her anguish as she informed those around her that we only have a few months until the planet is destroyed. This is a very real fear for anyone who admires Greta Thunberg, and so I was fully on board with what she was saying. The woman began by telling Ocasio-Cortez how much she admired her dedication to tackling the climate crisis but declared that limiting the use of fossil fuels isn’t enough. She then explained that the main problem is population levels but went on to suggest that even blowing up Russia would not have enough of an impact and there would still be too many people on the planet. ‘Your next campaign slogan should be this, “We need to start eating babies”‘. At this point, she was getting so agitated that Ocasio-Cortez continued her own speech while acknowledging the woman’s concerns and I have to say, I admired the way Ocasio-Cortez did not outright dismiss the woman’s plea, hoax or not.
It has since been speculated that the entire thing was a stunt enacted by a pro-Trump organization in an attempt to ridicule the rhetoric of climate emergency groups. A form of ‘satirical terrorism’ which to me, is the worst kind. Mockery of any kind is worse than bombs, because it’s much harder to diffuse laughter once it begins, and believe me I have tried. But, dear reader, if this is the case, then I would say they have failed abysmally because in my mind they have raised a valid solution. Perhaps this might not be the most popular take on the event, but if you really think about it… would there be anything morally wrong in eating babies if it saved everyone else on the planet?
We’re quick to dismiss the idea of eating babies as ‘barbaric’, but with only months left, what if it’s the ideal solution to the impending climate crisis? Admittedly, as a vegan, the idea of consuming the flesh of a living thing is abhorrent to me and so I would have to forego such an act, but as someone who is also very much pro-choice, if a woman decides that eating her baby is a good way for her to become more carbon-neutral, where’s the issue? Let’s face it, babies are annoying. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve been made to suffer the entitled mewling of a self-important infant while sitting in a Starbucks trying to write an important opinion piece about how I despise my parents because they voted differently to me, or how old people should do the decent thing and euthanize themselves to make way for a kinder and more compassionate generation of anti-capitalists, on my iPad Pro.
The majority of babies grow up to be bigots in any case. Personally, I intend never to breed. Procreation is a selfish act and only leads to more CO2 emissions and Trump voters. So this pathetic attempt at undermining the climate change issue has fallen far short and has merely served to open up a new conversation about possible solutions (for example, would bombing Russia be completely out of the question?). Nice try, climate deniers, but you scored an own goal with this one.