It’s been a bad couple of years for Jeffreys…

Veteran New Yorker reporter Jeffrey Toobin has been suspended from the magazine after he ‘exposed himself during a Zoom call last week’, according to VICE.

Toobin, who also serves as a CNN legal analyst, must have been reaching for the tissues as he described the incident as an ’embarrassingly stupid mistake’ and offered an apology to his ‘wife, family, friends and co-workers’ in a statement.

Cockburn is perhaps most surprised that Toobin is the first significant figure to be caught out during a video-conference, seven months into the COVID pandemic. What took us?

Naturally, Twitter users have been having a field day with the story:

Initially, Cockburn wondered whether some posters were jumping to conclusions too quickly. Perhaps poor Jeffrey was simply readjusting and this was all a big misunderstanding. Maybe a private dick should investigate. Then VICE updated the story to include more gruesome details: two sources saw Toobin pleasuring himself during an election simulation call featuring Jelani Cobb, Jane Mayer and other New Yorker big names. Graciously they appended this immortal editorial note: ‘This piece has been updated with more detail about the call and the headline has been updated to reflect that Toobin was masturbating.