Satire

milkshake godfrey elfwick

A milkshake a day keeps the fascists at bay

May 21, 2019 3:07 pm

Creamy droplets of sugar-infused milk rained upon Nigel Farage’s suit. A victory for peace-loving anti-fascists everywhere!

sexstrike godfrey elfwick alyssa milano

No #SexStrike please, we’re intersectional feminists

May 13, 2019 3:29 pm

I was disgusted by Alyssa Milano’s lack of consideration towards minorities such as me

royal baby godfrey elfwick

An interracial couple have birthed a mixed-race youngling

May 7, 2019 11:34 am

Godfrey’s advice on naming the royal baby

godfrey elfwick spoilers

Brace yourself Donny, spoilers are coming

May 3, 2019 10:51 am

Ruining Game of Thrones is in the global interest for Godfrey

my day joe biden

My day: Joe Biden

April 25, 2019 12:24 pm

As told to Dominic Green

matilda olofsson

My name is Matilda Olofsson and I am Greta Thunberg’s arch-nemesis

April 25, 2019 10:41 am

Who wants to save the planet anyway? I don’t

greta thunberg

Greta Thunberg, a modern-day Cassandra

April 24, 2019 4:19 pm

The Swedish teenager has successfully convinced other children to take time off school to draw attention to the coming apocalypse

white guilt

I embrace my White Guilt, and so should you

April 17, 2019 11:13 am

The amount of opportunities I have as a white male are staggering compared to those of a PoC

Vipassanā

Jack Dorsey opened my eyes to Vipassanā

April 10, 2019 11:54 am

Godfrey Elfwick describes his 10-day retreat

prince harry fortnite

Fortnite should be banned, I agree with Prince Harry

April 5, 2019 1:54 pm

When I was a young boy, I socialized plenty and spent very little time inside the house

brexit voters

Isn’t it time we forgave Brexit voters?

March 28, 2019 1:18 pm

Let’s Remain in the reassuringly authoritarian arms of the EU forever and ever

godfrey elfwick uri geller open letter

An open letter to Donald Trump from Godfrey Elfwick

March 24, 2019 5:47 pm

Beware Mr President, or I will unleash my psychic powers upon you

godfrey elfwick captain marvel

White men: Captain Marvel is not for you

March 14, 2019 12:36 pm

…although, if you fail to give it positive reviews, you are vile misogynists

free speech

Calm down! Your freedom of speech is not under threat

February 28, 2019 10:07 am

Anyone who has almost every aspect of their online life taken away from them is not ‘silenced’

godfrey elfwick empire jussie smollett attackers

I am holding an open audition for my attackers

February 20, 2019 4:07 am

Jussie Smollett is leading the charge in more ways than one

transblack esquire

The life of a transblack genderqueer Muslim atheist at 27

February 15, 2019 12:10 pm

Esquire profiled the wrong person this month. We all know who should have been on the cover

godfrey elfwick

The Winterfest Carol of Godfrey Elfwick

December 21, 2018 5:00 am

Godfrey bless us, every one!

Sacha Baron Cohen isn’t funny – especially when he’s mocking the powerless

July 26, 2018 10:02 am

I am troubled by the misuse to which he puts his considerable acting skills, quick brain and undoubted ballsiness.