Where oh where is Melania? For several weeks, the First Lady has been incommunicado, apart from a tweet issued on her account indicating that she is “feeling great” after her operation in May. On May 14, the White House said she was admitted to the hospital for an “an embolisation procedure to treat a benign kidney condition.” The appearance of the phrase “working overtime,” one that her husband, the president of the United States, often uses, only heightened suspicions that something, somehow, somewhere is amiss. Next, she failed to show up for White House Sports and Fitness Day on Wednesday even as President Trump demonstrated his prowess with the golf club.

Now her conservative defenders are alleging that there is a liberal media conspiracy to calumniate Melania. Why, conservative firebrand Dana Loesch asked, is the media speculating about Melania’s well-being when Hillary Clinton’s health was supposed to be off-limits? But it isn’t just liberals who are perplexed by her absence. Former House Speaker John Boehner weighed in today about the matter. “I think Donald Trump promised Melania that he would not win. She didn’t have to worry about ever living in the White House,” Boehner observed at the Mackinac Policy Conference in Michigan. “It’s probably why she doesn’t look real happy every day.”

One possibility could be that she simply doesn’t like the White House itself. One rumor has it that she’s living with her parents in Bethesda rather than sleeping in the White House. Another has it that she’s secretly staying with the Obamas and writing her memoirs. Another, less extravagant possibility is that she’s simply had enough of Trump himself. Bigly. Perhaps the simples explanation is that she’s tired of the limelight and wants her privacy.

America’s glossies are on the case. People magazine reports that Snopes founder and CEO David Mikkelson says, “You can’t blame people. She was suddenly in the hospital for something that hadn’t been announced in advance and she hasn’t been seen since. It could be perfectly innocuous, but it also could be a cover story for something else.”

Could this, not Russiagate, be the true coverup? Perhaps Robert Mueller will soon be on the case.